October 2, 2013
It's been 13 months since Mom went to stay at Marietta Care and Rehab.
Mary called me Thursday to say we had to get her house on the market by the end if the month and get the paperwork to Peggy at Family Services. That would be Monday.
So, I started calling Realtors at work. Got in touch with Dan Held of Coldwell Bankers who went to church with Mom and Dad and remembered them. We met at moms house after work so he can look at it and measure the rooms. We go everywhere, attic, basement, building, garage.
Friday, left work early and went to see  Dan Held. I explained our situation to him and told him that Mary was supposed to have Power of Attorney. He asked me where everyone lived and then asked why the one who lives the farthest away would be the one who needed to sign papers??  Mary calls me in the middle of the meeting and she won't lie and say she has p.o.a. so she winds up calling the attorney in Marietta recommended by the nursing home months ago. Months ago SISTA!!
She gets me an appointment first thing Monday and we agree that I have to be the one to sign legal documents for Mom. Dan Held shows me comparable listings in the area. Some have sold and some are still on the market. He thinks we should list it at $25,000 and will probably get between that and 20,000. Tells me we need to clean out the rooms and take up the carpet.Then he'll take some pictures on Monday and get the property listed.
Saturday Bob and I go to Mom's and spend 2 hours dragging trash out to the curb. I took Loretta's stuff out of the garage, everything I thought Mary might want that was still there  and brought some things down for baby Sophia's sale. I looked thru Mary's papers and found information on the credit line loan on the house for the realtor. Yay!
Then Sunday Jeff and Sophia, Loretta and Helen show up at Mom's and we do a good job on the house. Jeff tore out the carpet in the entry, living room and dining room. It really helped.
Monday I went to the lawyers. It's a little more complicated because Mom is an Ohio resident now and I'm not. Also because the house is in West Virginia and Mom is an Ohio resident. But they assured me that it was just paperwork and it was okay that I had signed the real estate form stating I had limited p.o.a. They just had to figure out what paperwork needed to be filed in what state.
Then I took paperwork about the house sale to Peggy at Family Services.
Then I stopped by the nursing home to sign a paper about Mom's flu shot,
Then I copied paperwork about the WesBanco loan and appraisal for the realtor and dropped it off with a key. And also faxed the property listing to Peggy since they have lost paperwork before ... taking no chances.
Then I went home and started getting a list of every one's address for the lawyers. Got an e-mail from the lawyer saying I need to get the doctor to sign WV and Ohio paperwork. Downloaded and printed that to take to the nursing home.
Tuesday I went to Marietta again, to the nursing home and dropped off the legal papers for the doctor  to sign. Talked to the social worker.
Wednesday, finally got all the addresses the lawyers need to get things rolling. All they're waiting on now is the paperwork from the doctor.Talked to Dan Held, the house is listed. He took some surprisingly good photos. There are 2 agents showing it today.
That's all. Except the long ladder is missing from the side of the building and Mary's dolly is missing from inside the building.

July 23, 2012.

Mary, Linda and I went to Eagle Pointe to see their dementia unit. Mary and I were both in tears almost the entire time we were there. First, because this is where Dad was forced to go. Secondly, because in spite of what they might tell you, the Alzheimer’s unit is just as bad as the rest of the facility. There were 4 people to a room, no personal items were allowed, they were very short-handed and worst of all the residents were all drugged. They just sat staring blankly in their wheelchairs or chairs.

Linda had checked out a place on Ghion Road that’s a sister unit to where she works in Dunbar. They didn’t have a dementia unit but they did mention a place in Marietta. I plugged the address in the GPS on my cell phone and we went there on the off chance that it was a decent place and would have a free bed.

It was straight uphill to get there. We almost missed the entrance to the parking lot and chanced upon a couple of ladies sitting outside. They asked if we needed help, we explained our situation; luckily we had happened on the very person we needed to talk to. She took us in the building and showed us around while explaining things to us. They have 2 people to a unit, a room available with a bed by the window, you’re allowed to bring a chair or dresser and photos and other things. But, most wonderful of all the residents were not acting drugged. A couple of residents were wandering the hallways, the staff talked to them by name and it didn’t stink.

We did paperwork and had Mom admitted by Thursday morning. We did more paperwork. Mary and I went with Mom down to see her room. Mom wanted to leave and go home. We sat there talking to a staff lady for quite awhile. They talked about the food and what Mom liked to eat and then she asked if Mom was hungry. Mom said ‘Yes.’; I grabbed Mary before she could say we’d go to the dining room with them. Mom left us without looking back.

We told Mom that her house was damaged by a bad storm and was being fixed up. She would have to stay here until the work was done. The first few days she asked about the house every time anyone visited. She also asked where Mary was. Mary thought that if she came to see Mom this early that Mom would suffer a setback in her adjustment to the new living place so she didn’t go back to visit after the first time.

It’s been a week and a half now. I went to see Mom today with Bob. She looks so much better. She gets a shower twice a week. She always looks clean and happy when I see her. She had a problem with her roommate and her shoes, but that’s been resolved. Her roommate, Wano, is perfect for her. They’re just a few months apart in age. She’s a friendly, nice lady. They both think it’s too cold where ever they are. They ask each other, “Are you going to stay the night here?’. Then they try to decide who will sleep in which bed.

Mom interacts with the other residents to an extent and she participates in the activities. She has a routine now, other people around her and she seems to be much happier. She does ask about her mom sometimes. But that’s something she’d been doing lately. 

October 16, 2011



Stopped by Mom's today, Loretta has no wheels. There were over flowing bowls of food on the kitchen floor for the cat but no water. There was cat poop in the bath tub, a mess in the litter box and no litter to refill it. There were several empty plastic fruit containers in the bathroom crawling with ants. The furnace was below 60 and the stove in her room was blowing air but had no fire lit. There were stained clothes on the bathroom floor.
I picked up the bowls and emptied them, didn't wash the dishes though. Put some water out for the crack cat. Cleaned the poop out of the tub, scraped the litter box (what is in that cat's piss that turns the litter into cement?) and went to the store to get more litter. Started a load of clothes, took out 2 bags of trash, turned the furnace on 70 and got the fire lit in her room. Told her Joe should be there soon to take her out to breakfast. Went home.
Then Joe calls and says she needs to take a sponge bath, well hell, I already took a shower and I can't wash Mom by myself. If she'd even listen to me, some days she won't. I don't know if he took her to breakfast or not.

We're trying to get Mom evaluated so a power of attorney can be issued, then a reverse mortgage can be obtained and finally, work can be done on her home. She really needs a walk in shower more to solve the hygiene problem. Then her carpet needs replaced and probably the roof and electrical.
We've applied for home help but apparently there's a long waiting list for that. Mary's been paying for Loretta to go to Mom's once or twice a day and give her the medicine and make sure she's eating. It's a relief to not have to remember to go there everyday. I just need to make sure I take some of the pressure off of Loretta and keep going there a few times each week.
Update on this, the attorney did nothing. NOTHING!  He wouldn't even return Mary's calls. He finally returned half of Joe's money to him. A$$#)le

August 2011

I haven't had access to a computer, that's one reason I haven't updated this post lately.
I almost skipped seeing Mom one day, but felt guilty and went anyway. Found her on the floor in the living room. She'd been there all night. She knocked her chair over when she sat down. I called Loretta and she flew over and got her on her feet. We re-arranged the living room, put a chair for her to sit in that won't move when she hits it full force.

Joe called to comment that Mom hasn't been changing her clothes. Well, for his information, one day she had on 4 shirts and 2 pair of pants; and another time went on the porch for a short time with no pants. So, the same clothes is not a problem. He mentioned it to her, and she was changed and dressed before I got there to help them. So I spent the time she was gone with him to breakfast to clean the house a little and toss some things that I didn't want her to see me tossing.

She's been letting Molly outside, now there are fleas in the house. Loretta has been spraying the house before she takes Mom out to Bob's.
She's been picking at her skin. Don't know if she's getting flea bites or yucky skin from not bathing. I came over and made Mary go to the drug store with me, she got body wash and medicated lotion for Mom. Mary got her in the shower and had her put some medicated lotion on her arms afterwards.
While Mary had her in the shower, I started cleaning the kitchen. I was dripping with sweat, but determined to do a good job, not the half-assed job I was tempted to do. Mary got Mom dressed and took her out to eat. She called Helen to tell her what I was up to and Helen showed up to mop and clean the bathroom and kitchen floor. We got some windows open and fan going, then there was a wonderful short shower that cooled things off a little.
Now I remember another reason I don't write here very often, too depressing.

2-21-11

Stopped by Momma's this morning to pill her and noticed that her storm door was gone. Went inside, no Momma. Her purple coat was there, her walker was outside but she's no where to be found.
Looked upstairs, in the building, bathroom and her room.
Called Sophia and texted Loretta and neither of them had her. Then I called Joe and Mary. Joe said he'd come over and help look, Mary said she'd talked to her earlier in the morning. No one knew anything about the storm door.
I rechecked all the rooms and started yelling for her outside. Tried a neighbors house, luckily the neighbor wasn't home. Meanwhile everyone I've contacted has called me back at least once and sent me looking in places I've already looked. Someone asked if I'd called Chuck, well of course not, Chuck's always at work.
I'm heading up the road looking down the avenues for her. Called Yvonne, she called Chuck and he had Momma. And he knew about the storm door, too. got broken by high winds and he removed it.
Here comes Loretta down 34th Street to help search, here comes Helen from River Road, and I finally get ahold of Joe to turn him back around. At least we know now that the 'Corra Family Search and Rescue' can be assembled in a matter of minutes.

another adventure

Stopped by Momma's on the way to work this morning. Had to empty the litter box again, full of TP, again. Also, lit the stove in the bathroom and the one in the bedroom. Both rooms were like iceboxes. I asked Momma why the fire was out in her room. She told me she never uses that stove. Aargh. I put her pension check in the laptop case so someone could take her to the bank to cash it.
Bob stopped by my work and I made him take me out to lunch. We went to Applebees and I ordered a new shrimp dish that has bokchoy, pea pods, whole wheat pasta and other goodies. Maybe cilantro, maybe not.
Anyway, I had just started eating when I got a phone call from my friend Jenny. She had seen Momma crossing Grand Central up by 46th street, in the middle of the block.
We called the waitress over and I packed up my lunch, had Bob drop me at work to get my car and went out looking for her. I didn't see her up Grand Central anywhere. I called Bob and asked him to stop by the house to see if she had turned around and gone home, happened to look up 47th Street as I passed it, and saw her way up the road. I pulled a u-turn as soon as I could and went up to 47th and 8th Avenue.
She was relieved to see me. The first thing she said was "Mom's baby sister died." Well, I thought she had gone completely around the bend with that remark. But, it turns out Mary Patterson had called and told her that her aunt had died, and her aunt was 2 years younger than her. So, she was completely coherent, just lost in Vienna. I think she was looking for Loretta's old house and just couldn't remember where it was.
I took her home and Sophia got there as I was leaving. I didn't see her, but she saw me and was trying to figure out what was going on. Many texts and phone calls later, Sophia took her to the bank and out to eat. Mom tried to leave a 30 dollar tip at Bob Evans and got irate with Sophia about it.
I got to finish my lunch after work. It was delish. I'll order it the next time I go there. Maybe it'll be a nice relaxing time.